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    Tuesday, October 17, 2006

    Tuesday Talkback

    This week marks the one year anniversary of Tuesday Talkback.

    Yesterday, I opened it up to you to talkback to those insufferable Moaners.

    "It's Sunday morning, and my moan today is, somebody stole my Plain Dealer this morning. Whoever did it, I hope they're on their way to church." - Cleveland

    Very generous thought - I'm impressed with your Christian forgiveness - but it doesn't work. I've tried it: You can hide the paper behind the pew, but turning the page makes too much noise unless there's singing. And there isn't enough singing to make the whole thing worth your while. I suggest leaving your iPod unattended next time. Those little earbuds are the Business. -- Evil John

    "Tops has a right to sell their stores if they want to, but do they have to close them during the holidays? Bah humbug! Why couldn't they wait till January? And why is it going to take five to six months to reopen these stores?" - Cleveland

    Since when do companies actually care about the customer. Come on, "customer service" is only for the share holders! -- Mel

    "My moan is to service stations that will not accept anything larger than $20 bills. I cannot remember the last time I filled my gas tank for under $20." - Avon

    It's a sad thought, that in Avon everyone's driving around with no more than three-quarters of a tank of gas. In the rest of the country you can pay for things with mutliple $20 bills. Personally, I find it convenient and really not very confusing at all. -- Evil John

    "Why can't the Cleveland State Recreational Center set aside a time for the public to use their facilities - gym, swimming pool, weights, etc.?" - East Cleveland

    You live in East Cleveland. I would think running away from muggers and ducking whenever a car backfires would keep you in shape. Why would you need to go to a gym? -- Anne

    "For those who answer telephones, 'hang on' or 'wait' are not professional or courteous comments. A simple 'one moment, please' will get you more respect." - Warrensville Heights

    Hang on a sec… -- Anne

    In my opinion "wait." is perfectly acceptable. Short, to the point, and that's another 1.5 seconds for me to forget why I called. So everybody wins. But then, my self image doesn't depend on exactly how nameless functionaries answer my calls. YMMV. Little known fact: In Honduras the common response when answering a phone is "Waste my time and I'll grind you to salsa. Including your hair!" Every culture offers something worth learning. -- Evil John

    "What's up, Plain Dealer? Notre Dame loses, it's front page news. When they win, it's hard to even find anything about it. We love Ohio State, but c'mon! A whole lot of Notre Dame fans live in Ohio, too. Let's be fair." - Rocky River

    There's just no pleasing some people. The headline proves how much we really, really hate Notre Dame and all it's alumni. And active hate is better then contemptuous silence, right? -- Evil John

    "You know, when the good Lord said, 'forgive them for they know not what they do,' he must've been thinkin' about the election board." - Middleburg Heights

    I'd have thought He was thinking about the big hole in His side, the nails through His limbs, the agony of the crucifixion, and the whole"Eternal Damnation or Eternal Life through Forgiveness" thing. But, lacking the authority of being a citizen of the former Onion Capital of the World, maybe I should rethink it. -- Evil John

    "You think your next-door neighbor is your friend until you find she's put rat poison under your bird feeder. - Fairview Park

    Don’t worry. Your neighbor is still your friend because you have to keep in mind that the rat poison was most likely meant for you. Consider yourself lucky that your neighbor didn’t have the guts to put it in your coffee or in that cake she brought over the other day. At the last minute, she remembered the good times you used to have…hey, how did you know it was rat poison? -- Brian

    "I'm complaining about people parking in handicap parking spots who really aren't handicapped. They get out of the car; they walk pretty damn fast! People abuse it." - No city

    Think of it as an invitation to turn them into honest folk. If you're still in your car it should be simple... and fun! -- Evil John

    "Whoever came up with this new game for the lottery should be fired. It's totally wrong." - Cleveland

    If a lottery were really a game, that'd be a persuasive and well articulated argument rather a simple waste of time. In Bizarro world everyone must be happy. -- Evil John

    "I am so angry about the news of the elderly woman who was robbed in the elevator and later had a heart attack and died. Only evil people prey on the elderly and young children. May they burn in hell!" - Westlake

    Evil people have been around since Cain and Abel, and have used the same trick in the book since that time. This is not news. Just another day in paradise. -- Mel

    "I'm very upset with the GOP and the oil companies for letting the gasoline prices tumble just when I'd gotten used to choosing between food and gas and losing 35 pounds." - Avon

    That's nearly witty. The people of Avon, lacking in math skills, arecompensated in other ways. It's almost worth it. -- Evil John

    "Shame on WTAM AM/1100 for running advertisements every single weekday morning for the Michigan Economic Development Corporation! Ohio, specifically the Cleveland area, gets no support, and yet a Cleveland-based radio station is promoting Michigan? I can't believe it!" - Medina

    What is the rate? Per word? Stupid Comment? Too much sports on TV now..Rangers, Mets, and then the BEARS....gotta go. Priorities!! -- Haves

    If WTAM AM/110 were in Avon they'd have to take payments in bills of$20 or less, which would rule out most out-of-state advertising. Talk to your city council about changing the laws. -- Evil John

    "If all the Metroparks have a bike path, then why are the cyclists riding in the street causing traffic jams and practically getting themselves killed? Isn't that why they call it a 'bike path!' " - Cleveland

    Are they getting killed? Or just practically getting killed? Because really, if you are practically driving on the road, and practically following the driving laws, then you should not practically kill a cyclist who has just as much right to be on the road as you. -- Anne

    "North Korea has gone nuclear. South Korea and China supply them with food and money. The fools in this country buy anything of China and South Korea manufacture. So we not only support communist China, but we also support nuclear North Korea." - Strongsville

    If only we could trust China and SK to allow ongoing humanitarian disasters to proceed unhindered, the world would be a better place. But I digress: The US also contributed about 200,000 tons of food to NK over the previous three years. Along with failing to disrupt our economy by banning business with two of our biggest trading partners, that puts us firmly on the wrong side of the GWOT. I see that now. The answer, clearly, is to invade ourselves... Sanctions would be too inhumane. Start the invasion with John Hopkins university - our casualties should be a military secret. -- Evil John

    Thank you, everyone! -- Audient

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    Blogger anne said ... (11:14 AM, October 17, 2006) : 

    Thanks for the nods, Audient! I am honored to be listed among the Tuesday Talkbackers. You are much better at it than I, and after slaving over this all day yesterday, I appreciate how hard it is to come up with something to say every week.

     

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