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    Tuesday, September 26, 2006

    Tuesday Talkback, Gangster Edition

    Yes, it is Tuesday, so I'm talking back to the Monday Moaners, but don't overlook my post about the exciting mail I received yesterday.

    "Strickland and Blackwell and everyone else can argue what they want about schools and education, but it's not going to do any good if the little gangsters don't want to learn." - Cleveland

    Oh sure, a few little gangsters, so let's forget the whole thing. Let's just give up, shut it all down and forget it.

    "There's something inherently wrong with the Channel 5 Athlete of the Week being sponsored by McDonald's." - Streetsboro

    Or how about this sad "Make Me Famous, Make Me Rich" by the Ohio Lottery? How about Little Gangster of the Week sponsored by Little Debbie? And in retrospect, those old Hertz ads featuring OJ running away turned out to be pretty wrong.

    "If Hillary Clinton gets to be president, we automatically get her husband on the same ticket. One's enough." - Cleveland

    Should have thought of that with Bush in 2000... before all these little gangsters flunked civics and voted for Buchanan and Nader.

    "If you watch the movie, 'Tora Tora Tora' and see the plight that Ford Motor is in, I would hope these so-called Americans would stop buying those Japanese cars." - Middleburg Heights

    Oh sure, we have a patriotic duty to buy inferior product -- manufactured by little gangsters all growed up now.

    "Why can't sex offenders have a colored license, perhaps pink and blue, as the drunken drivers have. Then we can find them, see them and stay away from them." - North Olmsted

    Do we really "stay away from" people with "party plates"? Besides, if you want to stay away from sex offenders' vehicles, just avoid plain white cargo vans. That'll take care of most of them. And besides, the drivers of those plain white vans are just looking for little gangsters.

    "I plead to the local female newscasters to go to a reputable beauty salon for an updated hairdo, one that will be in proportion with the shapes of their faces." - Beachwood

    This little gangster thinks the plastic girls on TV aren't pretty enough -- perhaps this Beachwood moaner knows a good plastic surgeon, too.

    "It was outrageous for CNN to run distracting news crawlers across the screen all during Larry King's outstanding interview with Jimmy Carter." - Berea

    More outrageous than the crawlers is that those little gangsters still give that softball-tossing fossil Larry King a show.

    "What is with all these white signs that say 'hot tub for sale.' It's the same price, the same sign, year after year. Is it the same person selling the same hot tub and claiming it's never been used?" - Medina

    I guess they don't clean off the utility poles very often in Medina. Perhaps we could pay the little gangsters 25 cents for each sign they take down.

    "Shame on the city of Cleveland for its failure to adequately maintain the Convention Center. Far better to close the center than embarrass the city with its subpar facility." - Lakewood

    Seriously? This little gangster for real? Sounds like this little gangster is trying to embarrass us into supporting a new convention center.

    "When I called the gas company, I was able to put myself on a call back and they called me back within four minutes. And then I spent the next five minutes on hold." - Cleveland

    Your first mistake: you CALLED the gas company. I never talk to those little gangsters. We have nothing to say.

    "All we hear is that more people should vote, but I'm on the verge of never voting again to get my name off their call list. Why are political calls exempt from the Do Not Call list?" - Parma

    Um... it is called the First Amendment. I guess little gangsters in Parma don't want to learn either.

    "Whoever designed the new yellow pages, how many beers did you have?" - Cleveland

    Not too many -- the pages are still yellow. Every little gangster knows that if you drink more beer, the yellow turns clear.

    "When the United States Supreme Court makes a ruling, it is enforced. When the Ohio Supreme Court makes a ruling about school funding, why isn't that enforced?" - Lyndhurst

    The US Supreme Court rulings are "enforced" only by respect for the court as an institution. It has no army, no police department to "enforce" its rulings. And neither does the Ohio Supreme Court. But here in Ohio we know that "with little gangsters, all things are possible."

    "Shame. There is a picture of the leaders of Israel and Palestine communicating about peace, and the leader of our country shuns Iran's leaders. He's just pandering to the Christian right without actually showing a Christian spirit." - Shaker Heights

    Israel and Palestine leaders communicating about peace? What history book are you looking at? Iran's "leader" is an anti-semite of the worst kind, and deserves no respect from us. He is a short little gangster. And speaking of Christian spirit, let's not forget about what the Pope said.

    "I'm sick of hearing about kids shooting people and then they ask if they should try them as an adult. What a bunch of pinheads." - No city

    Uhhhh, you'd rather send the little gangsters to their rooms without supper? This moaner seems to think that the discussion is not worthy of having, but then what? Try them as kids, or try them as adults? It is a legitimate question.

    "Where do the Muslim clerics get off demanding that the pope step down? Who do they think they are?" - Parma Heights

    Ummmm, little gangsters? Watching the reaction to what the Pope said has been fascinating. So has watching the Pope allow himself to be bullied into apologizing. What the Pope said the first time was clumsy and inartful. If he wanted to criticize Islamic extremists there were better ways to do it. Maybe the idea of getting assassinated by a terrorist got to him. Whatever said or whatever he meant to say, I thought the Pope would have had bigger stones to stick by it.


    Comments on "Tuesday Talkback, Gangster Edition"


    Blogger asdfsdf said ... (10:21 AM, September 26, 2006) : 

    Do we really "stay away from" people with "party plates"?

    HA HA HA! I tend to giggle and give the person a little nod when I see party plates rather than shun them. Giving sex offenders pink or blue plates would only allow us to know who's easy.

    What about if you have party plates AND sex offender plates? I'd call that a free dating service. Er, I mean...I love Jesus.


    Blogger anne said ... (3:17 PM, September 26, 2006) : 

    If North Olmsted is really concerned about sex offenders, you can find out online where they live, and tag their cars yourself. A little spray paint and a key and you can have a personalized identification system.


    Blogger melcarrel said ... (10:46 PM, September 26, 2006) : 

    Watching "tora, tora, tora" made me not want to buy Japanese cars, so I bought a German one.

    From your analysis, the person who did the white pages had more beers. Is that correct? We should put that on the test for little gangsters.


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