|More talking back to the knee-biters who phone into Monday Moaning -- I rib them for your pleasure and mine.|
"Why is it that highly educated people write ads and say 'free gift'? If it's free, it is a gift, period." - Lorain
I think you've made a fundamental error in assuming that highly educated people write such ads. Some ads are very clever, and are likely the product of highly educated people. No ad that screams "free gift" is such an ad. Also, do not forget the maxim, "There is no free lunch." I assure you, despite its seeming redundancy, there is no "free gift" either.
"They should put those red light cameras in school zones. You would probably pay for them in six months." - Garfield Heights
Why do people think that the red light cameras will create that much revenue? Once they are in, people will get wise and either slow down, come to a complete stop, or find a new route. Did I mention that Superior from downtown to the Heights has NO RED LIGHT CAMERAS? The other night I made it from East 12th to East 105th without having to stop!
"I get very annoyed when I see and hear of children being referred to as 'kids.' I am not a goat. I gave birth to children. And I'm sure the other children I see around the neighborhoods do not have a goat for a mother either." - Maple Heights
OK, it is clear to me that what you are is not a goat, so we won't call your offspring kids anymore. We will call them puppies instead.
"I work for a local delivery company and have to walk up driveways. Some people do not clear or get the ice off their driveway. I slip and fall and hurt myself and I can't do anything about that. And people wonder why their packages are damaged." - Parma Heights
Now, I am wondering -- do the packages get damaged because you land on them when you slip and fall? Or do you beat on the packages out of frustration? Look, if the driveway is not passable, why are you risking your neck? That’s stupid. And you have no one to blame but yourself for taking unnecessary risks. I am sure your employer doesn’t want you hurting your fool self within the course of your employment.
"The morning weather forecasters who refuse to say 'precipitation' and say 'precip.' They are neither hip nor cool. They are plain lazy and they should all be fired." -Cleveland
It seems as if morning weather forecasters can do nothing right. Since you cannot actually blame them for the weather, you blame them for how they report it. I am glad I am not married to you, and I am very glad I am not your puppy.
"If service stations are concerned about drive-offs, they could reduce the problem if they would just come out and pump our gas." - Streetsboro
They have reduced the problem by requiring people to pay first. I think you are just lazy. Or perhaps you are from New Jersey, and are spoiled by their law requiring that the gas stations pump the gas for you. As someone who had a job pumping gas in college, I'd agree that no one ever drove off from the full service pump. Plus I’d’ve caught that Buick on foot before it left the parking lot. But the extra 30 cents a gallon we charged also prevented most people from even pulling up to that pump.
"Merry Christmas to the ACLU (Anti-Christian Liberties Union)." - Brooklyn
Now now, you've got it all wrong. Don't you know it is the American Commie Lovers Union? I kid the ACLU, God bless them. And their little dogs, too!
"When will Parma police enforce the no parking ban during the nighttime hours? - Parma
When? As soon as they get their overtime hours back. Ow, did I just touch on a sore spot, or what?
"I can't believe the White House has the nerve to publicize how many pounds of ham, turkey, lamb, beef, etc. that they will be serving for Christmas, while people are starving and do not even have homes." - Rocky River
Well, I can't believe the White House has the nerve to listen in on people's phone calls without a court order, while some people don't even have telephones!
"To all the people who walk in the street after it snows. If you have to walk, recall that it is Cleveland and it is winter. Buy a pair of boots. You're much safer on the sidewalk than in the icy street with cars and SUVs. If you slip and fall on the sidewalk, you won't injure yourself as badly as if I run you over with my 4-by-4 because you're out in the middle of the street." - Lakewood
I was all ready to agree with this guy until he brought up his 4-by-4. You know what? Your vehicle isn't even made for the road. So, let's make a deal. All pedestrians stay on the sidewalks where they belong, and you and your 4-by-4 stay in rural un-paved areas where you belong.
"Where do they get the people who plow the snow at all the mall parking lots? They shove piles of snow into the handicapped areas." - Maple Heights
I think they get them from Lakewood -- where at least one 4-by-4 driver takes pleasure in watching people slip and fall, that son of a puppy’s mom!
Labels: Tuesday Talkback